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Author Topic: Blonde Joke  (Read 3310 times)
jgalo
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« on: May 05, 2009, 06:31:56 PM »

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away... Florida or the moon 
  The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ?????"   dh1
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sam-e jo
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« Reply #1 on: May 05, 2009, 08:12:13 PM »

That was pritty good. How about this one......

Do you know what stretchyist part of your body is?......

You'r a**! s53

Do you not agree well it says so right in the Bible Moses tied his a** s53 to a tree and walked 3 miles. s020 el23 lol2
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fstxrico
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« Reply #2 on: May 05, 2009, 08:46:42 PM »

OK. One of those blondes has a fire at home and call the fire department. "How do we get to your house?" asks the dispatcher.
The gal calmly replies "UM something wrong with the big red fire truck?"
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jgalo
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« Reply #3 on: May 05, 2009, 10:15:16 PM »

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it. 
    "Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me." 
The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed;  likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream. 
   The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you? 
    "Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde." 
    "I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken" 
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sam-e jo
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« Reply #4 on: May 06, 2009, 03:45:43 PM »

Hay they had some thing like that on House one night only it was a guy,LOL.
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jgalo
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« Reply #5 on: May 06, 2009, 07:02:35 PM »

 dh1 Sorry no offense ment
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jgalo
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« Reply #6 on: May 06, 2009, 07:15:28 PM »

This ones for you Sam-e o

Jane's dishwasher quit working so she called in a repairman.
Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, 'I'll leave the key under the mat.
Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a check.
Oh, by the way don't worry about my dog Spike.
He won't bother you.



But, whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot !!!!!!!'             
     


'I MUST STRESS TO YOU:  DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT !!!!!!!'

When the repairman arrived at Jane's home the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking dog he has ever seen.
But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman goes about his work.

The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing and name calling.

Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled, 'Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!!!'

To which the parrot replied, 'Get him Spike!!!'

See - Men just don't listen!!!!!!! 
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sam-e jo
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« Reply #7 on: May 07, 2009, 03:52:07 PM »

Thats good I love it,LOL!!! dvl lol2
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fstxrico
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« Reply #8 on: May 07, 2009, 06:57:11 PM »

One day long long ago there was a woman who neither complained nor nagged her hard working and tired husband.  But it was long ago and only the one day.

OK not really a blonde joke, but it's better than a sharp stick to the eye.    t1
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sam-e jo
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« Reply #9 on: May 08, 2009, 01:19:41 PM »

You do know mens brains mature slower then womens,LOL. bb7 t15

Men Are Like...
   
... Blenders.
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

... Chocolate Bars.
Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.

... Coffee.
The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.

... Commercials.
You can't believe a word they say.

... Computers.
Hard to figure out and never have enough memory.

... Coolers.
Load them with beer and you can take them anywhere.

... Copiers.
You need them for reproduction, but that's about it.

... Curling Irons.
They're always hot, and they're always in your hair.

... Government Bonds.
They take way too long to mature.

... Horoscopes.
They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.

... Lava Lamps.
Fun to look at, but not all that bright.

... Mascara.
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

... Parking Spots.
The good ones are already taken and the ones that are left are either handicapped or extremely small.

... Popcorn.
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

... Weather.
Nothing can be done to change either one of them.
 
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